the daily purge 1-31-17

“Oh, sure, I’d be happy to house sit for you for three weeks.” “Thanks, feel free to do whatever. Watch tv, listen to the stereo.” “Cool, man. Danke.” Has this ever happened to you? Of course it has  because you’re a great guy. Now be honest, how great were you when you settled in on……

the daily purge 1-30-17

The T P Lutheran is purging a cordless car phone charger. It requires a cord but I don’t know where it is. Maybe it was placed in a box and sent to the trash, or eaten by a hongry dog, or stolen by a surfer at the beach. Even though it does not have a……

the view from the pew 1-28-17

“ … and what does the Lord require of you? . New song worship, fourth Sunday after the Epiphany Saturday services run pretty much the same. There are about 50 persons in attendance. Finding your favorite pew is rarely an issue. And when we hit the end of January, the Christian witnesses are in full……

the daily purge 1-27-17

Shortly after The Purging Lutheran inserted this photograph for today’s purge, I received a phone call from Diane Arbus demanding I stop trying to take ‘neat’ pictures, that there was only room for one ‘creative force in nature’ and that was her, not me. My response? To quote Bill the Cat: TTBBFT! What’s the purge? It……

the daily purge 1-26-17

Shortly after The Purging Lutheran inserted this photograph for today’s purge, I received a phone call from Salvador Dali demanding I stop trying to take ‘neat’ pictures, that there was only room for one ‘creative force in nature’ and that was him, not me. My response? To quote Bill the Cat: TTBBFT!  What’s the purge?……

the daily purge 1-25-17

In today’s issue of Purgely’s Believe It Or What? we have the remains of a weight machine The Purging L once used. It was kept in our basement away from prying eyes and ears so no one could witness hopeless grunting. What makes this so special isn’t that it isn’t being tossed out like so many……

the daily purge 1-24-17

If you are a parent with teen-aged children, an aunt or uncle with teen-aged nieces and nephews, a movie producer with teen-aged actors and actresses, a junior high school vice principal with teen-aged students, an emperor with teen-aged subjects, a soda jerk with teen-aged slackers, a yurt twiner with teen-aged campers, or an insurance salesperson……

the view from the pew+ 1-22-17

The third Sunday of Epiphany brings Susan, Aleksandrs and me to the Indianapolis Latvian Church. Our hymns included Drawn to the Light; Songs of Thankfulness and Praise; What Feast of Love; and Will You Come and Follow Me?. Our readings were Isaiah 9:1-4; 1 Corinthians 1:10-18; and from Matthew 4:12-23. We met at the table……

the daily purge 1-23-17

One day many days/weeks/months/years from now, The P Lutheran’s pile of purgeables will fit neatly in this tub. Except now we have a paradox. This tub has been purged so how will I know when my pile has shrunk enough to fit in a tub that is no longer here? I think I can answer……

the daily purge 1-20-17

“I have a diary in which I will jot down all my innermost thoughts and plans for the future.” – young junior high school girl ~ Dear Diary, I hope that one day I will be a doctor and help people and take care of them. ~ Dear Diary, my friend, Alysha, told me that……

the daily purge 1-19-17

Where do we get these things? What are these things? Is it a pen? Is it a baton? Is it a squeeze ball? Is it a ‘slimey spider’ toy you toss on the glass patio door and it quishes its way down to the floor? Is it a coded message written only in ‘B’s and……

the daily purge 1-18-17

It’s not just ‘Barbecue’ but rather, ‘Barbecue!’. Exclamation points are used to make food taste better, card games more exciting, and The Facebook entries more intriguing. They make a sentence less boring. They make a sentence less boring! The Purging Lutheran most likely bought this book when I worked at Borders a few decades ago.……

the daily purge 1-17-17

During The Purging Lutheran’s recent rehab I had one of those ‘roomba’ days. Roombas are robotic, autonomous machines that vacuum floors. They buzz in a straight line until they boink! into a chair, wall or table then go off in another direction. I wasn’t doing the ‘thorazine shuffle’ or anything (that’s not my issue), I……

the daily purge 1-16-17

“Cheer, cheer for ol’ gold and blue, c’mon team we’re all proud of you…” These are the opening lines to the Carmel High School fight song. As a young lad, The Purging Lutheran thought it was a pretty cool song until … DUN Dun dunnnnnn … I heard the University of Notre Dame fight song.……

the view from the pew 1-15-17

What? A Sunday service? Yes, a 10:45 AM service with organ music, a jumble of kids for ‘children’s church’, and ushers wearing suits and ties. It was nice to see some Lutheran faces after a few months of sleeping in on Sundays (one of Susan’s super powers). Despite my earlier beefs about volume issues during……

the daily purge 1-13-17

(this is the successor to yesterday’s purge) My Sweet Rib’s teeny, tiny toes fit in these … what are they? Slippers? Dress shoes? Work shoes? Lounge-abouts? No matter. She wore them with style and grace as though her feet once belonged to Queen Elizabeth II. These came with pre-tied ‘bunny ears’ on them which allowed……

the daily purge 1-12-17

It is no wonder that obesity is an issue in our country today. As a  people we have loosened our national belt three notches just in the past 15 years. The same notch that held up the republic’s trousers in 2002 over Topeka, Kansas has stretched westward where now that same notch rests uncomfortably over Pueblo,……

the daily purge 1-11-17

Brush. How many words, real words, can you spell from these five letters? My Sweet Rib and her The Purging Lutheran play a game on the innerwebble named Jumbline. It gives you a jumble of 5,6, or 7 letters and you are left to spell as many 3,4,5,6, and 7 words you can from it.……

the daily purge 1-10-17

What we have here is a basket of My Sweet Rib’s clothes she had T P Lutheran drop off at The ‘Will. Without going into a lot of detail this looks like pretty good stuff. Even a shirt(?) that has sail boats on it. Naturally, you now want to recite In 1492.* There’s always that guy……

the daily purge 1-9-17

These five Christmas plates were bought by My Sweet Rib and her life partner, The P Lutheran, a very long time ago. Where did you get them? Probably Target. Yes, Target. Why? Uh, to serve Christmas cookies from? Did you? At least once. Why not more? Jeepers, do I have to know everything? Why so touchy?……

the view from the pew 1-7-17

Why Saturday evening service so often? It’s because my son, Aleksandrs, prefers this service and Susan and I like to attend with him. We enjoy a more sedate piano/acoustic guitar duo than the classic hymn-driven service with the organ cranked up above a sanctuary full of worshippers. And the 11 AM praise (read: rock-n-roll) service?……

the daily purge 1-6-17

Red bowl. It’s a fine looking red bowl. It mostly held mashed potatoes. Mmmmm, mashed potatoes. (insert drooling Homer Simpson here). While we are on the topic of drooling, let us see what else Homer has to say: “Marge, it takes two to lie. One to lie and one to listen.” “Ah, the Luftwaffe. The Washington……

the daily purge 1-5-17

Venus and Mars may be alright tonight but salt and pepper are necessary dietary supplements every day … in moderate amounts, of course. My Sweet Rib and T P Lutheran bought these spice orbs long, long ago probably in Broad Ripple where all the cool kitchen gadgets such as tattooed dinner plates, garlic presses on……

the daily purge 1-4-17

This is a trophy The Lad won long ago when he was involved with Tae Kwon Do. It is for first place, sparring division. It meant that when he was 12 or so he could, if he desired, k-nock you around and there was very little you could do about it. He never desired to……

the daily purge 1-3-17

These ‘keep-’em-orderly’ storage units came in handy when The Lad and My Marta were being homeschooled. They attended Hope Christian School, financed by My Sweet Rib and operated by The Purging Lutheran. Our mascot was the Hope Christian School Bunny. We had a school song, certainly not a ‘fight song’ because who feels like ‘rasslin’……