Due to Covid-19* you are likely still stuck in isolation with persons you’d hoped were your loved ones. You know by now if that’s fact or friction. Only you know whether your housemate’s
persistent throat clearing
grunting when sitting in a chair
groaning while rising from a chair
using all the toilet paper
leaving the toilet seat up
leaving the toilet seat down (if you’re a guy)
toothpicks, toothpicks, toothpicks
honking while blowing nose blowing
have endeared them to you or set your teeth on edge. Good luck with that either way.
If you are showing signs of ‘irritable life syndrome’ then your attention span is probably at wits’ end. If this is indeed the case let me help you out by posting some pictures I’ve had saved but want to get out of my photo files. Pictures are easier to look at and, in most cases, don’t require explanation. It’s been said ‘a picture is worth a thousand words’ so feel free to use how many words you need (up to a thousand) to decipher what’s happening in these photygraphs. I’ll add my commentary in case you need help.
Nikita Khrushchev was either quoted or mis-quoted as having said:
“We will take America without firing a shot … we will bury you!“
Even if he never said it it surely sounds as something he or his socialist-thug friends would have said. Capitalism always has the last say.
This is an illustration of a woman being accosted by miniature asparagus men. Who are they? Where did they come from? Why did they choose this woman? What was Dorantes’ inspiration? I claim ignorance. You need to figure it out.
My niece, Edbert, is fond of saying, “Two things can be true”. I dedicate this picture to her.
I read recently that employees at Amazon, Target and other ‘big box’ stores and online delivery websites are planning a strike during their lunch hours on May 1, 2020. This is meant to bring attention to health conditions for employees who work in distribution and delivery centers … due to Covid-19. This what I imagine the back of a Walmart truck will look like at that time.
This is probably truer than we all like to admit.
Carbs, carbs, carbs! If you read enough of these books you’re left with the conclusions that carbohydrates are the enemy of all mankind. Well, this is equally true and not true. We, meaning us, need carbohydrates found in foods to give us some git-up-and-go-lil-doagie so we can have the energy to meet the day. While carbs give us energy to run marathons, work construction all day and cut lawns until the moon comes out at night we need to be careful just how many of them we consume. If we eat just the right amount of these energy-essential doohickies we maintain our weight. If we eat loaves of heavily processed white bread and pots of spag-hetti, those unused carbs get lazy and become fat cells which like to congregate around your belly. It’s just a plain, scientific fack.
I suffered from the this carbolistic condition but since my lap band surgery white bread is out out out. It’s a procedure with prohibits me from eating bread and while I miss an yuge deli sandwich now and then it’s for mine own good. Goodbye, book.
Titus 1:5-12 (we never hear much from Titus, do we?)
I left you in charge in Crete so you could complete what I left half-done. Appoint leaders in every town according to my instructions. As you select them, ask, “Is this man well-thought-of? Is he committed to his wife? Are his children believers? Do they respect him and stay out of trouble?” It’s important that a church leader, responsible for the affairs in God’s house, be looked up to—not pushy, not short-tempered, not a drunk, not a bully, not money-hungry. He must welcome people, be helpful, wise, fair, reverent, have a good grip on himself, and have a good grip on the Message, knowing how to use the truth to either spur people on in knowledge or stop them in their tracks if they oppose it.
10-16 For there are a lot of rebels out there, full of loose, confusing, and deceiving talk. Those who were brought up religious and ought to know better are the worst. They’ve got to be shut up. They’re disrupting entire families with their teaching, and all for the sake of a fast buck. One of their own prophets said it best:
The Cretans are liars from the womb,
barking dogs, lazy bellies.
* trademarked by My Sweet Rib
** probably not a real thing. After all, where can you get a real Slurpee if you’re stuck in your living room?