“Non-adventures in Cooking Week” continues …
Rice, rice, rice, rice. When rice hooks up with wheat, most of the world is fed. Rice in the East and wheat in the West. The The Purging Lutheran appears to be stockpiling rice. What does he know about wheat? Is wheat going out of fashion? Is wheat being cross-pollinated with petunias by punk bees just to cause trouble? No. According to the newest issue of Wheat Weekly, wheat has never been more abundant or healthy as it is now. No, TPL has so much rice because I forgot I had rice the last time I bought rice and the time before that. I used it to make a chicken and rice casserole, a yummy meal, but it fell off the radar when The Lad changed religions and became a vegan. It was too much for just My Sweet Rib and me to eat at one sitting and she don’t cotton to leftovers. So the rice just sat in the pantry and became too old.
OK, now that you’re convinced that rice is, indeed, used for food, the question needs to be asked, “Have any songs been written about rice?”. Lucky you. The Lemon Pipers, a psychedelic band from Ohio known for their yuge hit, Green Tamourine, wrote a minor flop called Rice is Nice. Lyrics? You got ’em!
I wanna find somebody to care
I wanna catch some rice in my hair
I need love and I want you, I do
I wanna spend my life loving you
Refrain: Rice Is Nice, that’s what they say
Rice Is Nice, throw some my way
Rice Is Nice on any day
Twice as nice when violins play
If I decide to walk beside you
Can I depend on your love staying true?
And when I get older and wrinkles appear
Will I still find some rice in my hair
He told another story. “God’s kingdom is like a farmer who planted good seed in his field. That night, while his hired men were asleep, his enemy sowed thistles all through the wheat and slipped away before dawn. When the first green shoots appeared and the grain began to form, the thistles showed up, too.
“The farmhands came to the farmer and said, ‘Master, that was clean seed you planted, wasn’t it? Where did these thistles come from?’
“He answered, ‘Some enemy did this.’
“The farmhands asked, ‘Should we weed out the thistles?’
“He said, ‘No, if you weed the thistles, you’ll pull up the wheat, too. Let them grow together until harvest time. Then I’ll instruct the harvesters to pull up the thistles and tie them in bundles for the fire, then gather the wheat and put it in the barn.’”