If you are a cashier at any of the restaurants where The Purging Lutheran sups, you’ll recognize my signature in this picture. Years ago I quit signing my name as it appears on my birth certificate and started signaturing my name as a series of loops or circles. Who ever checks signatures any more anyway?
Today’s purge is an old time iPhone charger. Just to make an extra drachma, the boys in marketing at Apple decided to change the size of the input hole on newer versions of said smartphone. If you wanted to upgrade to the newest phone then you were stuck with buying a new charger as well. If Steve Jobs was alive today he’d be spinning in his grave.
It turns out that I made a grievous economic error in yesterday’s purge. My local economist, My Sweet Greenspan, told me yesterday that demand for coffee beans would actually drive UP the cost of coffee across these united states. I surely mistook ‘supply and demand’ for ‘supply or demand’ which is not to be mistaken for the economic theory of crime, ‘surprise and demand’, wherein a crook surprises a bank teller and demands money.
Do you want to be on good terms with the government? Be a responsible citizen and you’ll get on just fine, the government working to your advantage. But if you’re breaking the rules right and left, watch out. The police aren’t there just to be admired in their uniforms. God also has an interest in keeping order, and he uses them to do it. That’s why you must live responsibly—not just to avoid punishment but also because it’s the right way to live.