What do you get when you mix a boxer, a burger and a bag? A trip to the garbage can to throw this George Foreman grill away.
“But, why, The Purging Lutheran, why? Why do you throw it away? Was it broken? Did you give up meat?”
No, concerned citizen, those aren’t the reasons. I threw away a fine functioning grilling machine. Why? Because it was difficult to clean. The hotting elements on this early version could not be washed separately from the rest of the unit. It could not be soaked or you stood to be electrocuted the next time you plugged it in. It required a damp cloth or sponge to wipe it clean, and if you just cooked a lesser grade of ground bif for your in-laws then there was even more gunk to scrape. Double ugh.
What? What’s that you say? Of course I’ll tell you something interesting about George Foreman. Really, the only two things you need to know about His Georgeness is that, one (1), he has five sons. All named George. And an adopted daughter named Georgetta. None of his other many children are named ‘George’.
And the other (2) thing you need to know about George Foreman is that he is a minister at a church in Texas. He came to Christ after a beating he took from Jimmy Young in 1997. So do yourself a favor and don’t be standing next to Old Nick when George uppercuts him down to the pit.
Job 3:7 Arise, O LORD; save me, O my God! For You have smitten all my enemies on the cheek; You have shattered the teeth of the wicked.